Sunday, February 26, 2012

JUST WHEN I THOUGHT...

I thought the good part of life had started, but I guess I was wrong. It's been a pretty rough couple months, and sometimes I feel I'm drowning on my own life.  I tried to do different things, I looked up for help, I talked to people, I did everything I was supposed to do, and still everything is a mess.  One wave after another and everything I go for air another wave hit me and push me even more further down.  I thought about giving up, and I think about it everyday.  I will have to admit that it is scary, and I think about my family.  I have a brother who will be devastate and I have a sister who will never forgive me.  So, here I am... Trying so hard not to be selfish.  I lost respect for life, I lost respect for myself, I'm not the same and I will never be.  Something happened, long time ago... I'm not allowed to talk about it, but it did happened and now I'm not in the right place. 
I'm always angry, I'm always running, but every time I look back, there is and I can't get rid of it.

Tears, nights when I haven't close my eyes, anger, madness... all have run me over and each time take a piece of what was left of me. 

When I thought this was over, I realized it was just the beginning of another hits of waves and I asked myself, ARE YOU READY? 
I haven't answer the question, I haven't think about it...but I know one thing, I WILL BE PUSH AROUND, I WILL GET HURT, I WILL BLEED, I WILL CRY, I WILL SCREAM, AND THROUGH THE PAIN I WILL ALWAYS KNOW I'M STILL HERE...


D11

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